Sunday, 26 April 2015

My review of the film 'Into the Woods'

I am feeling rather chipper today because it's still the weekend, so here's my first ever written review of a film version of a musical! My (un)fortunate target is 'Into the Woods' starring Meryl Streep and James Corden. You can sing my review to the tune of 'Funiculì Funiculà' by Peppino Turco and Luigi Denza (arranged by Joel Perri) as I did.

Let's go, let's go, watch another show
Let's go, let's go, watch another show
Where tunes entrance
And lyrics dance
Where tunes entrance
And lyrics dance

This is not a musical, it is an opera!

Verse One:
I watched this show with such high expectations
It left me sad, it left me sad.
The songs were long and emptied of emotions
They were so bad, they were so bad.
The tunes seemed to be highly repetitive
They hurt my ears, they hurt my ears.
I think this show is the most tuneless songfest
I've seen in years, I've seen in years.

Chorus x 2

Verse Two:
The action moved fast and I didn't mind that
That was ok; that was ok.
The more I watched the more I was surprised that
This was a play; this was a play.
There were too many plots and subplots going
Who were the stars? Who were the stars?
As a musical this was confusing
It was a farce; it was a farce.

Chorus x 2

Verse Three:

The actors were all very good at acting
They weren't to blame; they weren't to blame.
And though there was much atmospheric lighting
The film was lame. The film was lame.
Men have always been favoured in folktales
So I asked why, yes I asked why:
Why, in this 'update', did the strong females
All have to die? All have to die?

Chorus x 2

Enjoy and have a fun Sunday :-)!

Thursday, 9 April 2015

The Curious Case of Jeremy Clarkson

For those of you in the know, Jeremy Clarkson needs no introduction.

For those of you who don’t know, the BBC announced, very publicly, that it didn’t want to renew Clarkson’s contract to present ‘Top Gear’ (a popular BBC show about cars) after it investigated an allegation that he had punched a colleague. 

The BBC also announced that during the investigation, it had found that Clarkson punched the colleague because the colleague had fed him cold scraps instead of a nice, juicy, hot steak after a hard day’s work, and that the colleague had to go to A&E.

After Clarkson’s sacking, the police announced that Clarkson’s colleague did not want to press charges against Clarkson, and that they weren’t getting involved.

Yesterday, the BBC rehired Clarkson as a presenter of another show.

Since the BBC declared so publicly and with certainty that it had found that Clarkson had punched his colleague, why does the colleague still have to press charges against him?

For the police and courts to be involved, did Clarkson have to punch that colleague harder? 

Surely it is the role of the police and courts to investigate and declare if a crime has happened, not the BBC. Whatever happened to toes getting stepped on?

Whether I’m a fan of Clarkson or not, it’s certainly complicated outside the cushty world of ‘Top Gear’!